I’m Not Leash Walking My Future Kid(s)
Things I will never plan on doing: claim to have been abducted by aliens, attempt to cook vaththalkuzhambu, mess with Chuck NorrisÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ beard and, oh yeah, leash walk my future kid(s). Apparently, these child leashes seem to be somewhat popular based on the frequent oh yeahs I get upon mentioning them to any of my friends, but CÃ¢â‚¬â„¢MONÃ¢â‚¬Â¦ a child leash? I can understand Beary White. HeÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s got the attention span of a doorstop and would immediately bail on me, chasing a blowing leaf at first sight. But a kid? Now, thatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s something else. The first moment I saw a dad leash walking his toddler son at a mall, I did a double-take. Ã¢â‚¬Å“What the hell is that?Ã¢â‚¬Â jumped to mind, followed by Ã¢â‚¬Å“no freakin way,Ã¢â‚¬Â followed by Ã¢â‚¬Å“oh man, I gotta take a picture of this.Ã¢â‚¬Â *Click.* I understand the point Ã¢â‚¬â€œ safety Ã¢â‚¬â€œ and the convenience of it all, and IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m sure I might reconsider once said future kid(s) plant(s) his/her feet on the ground. You can never play it too safe as IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m sure my mom would probably tout. As of right this moment, though, I think the dog influence on our human lives needs to take two paw steps back. ItÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s overkill. Besides, watching a kid on leash constantly reminds me of this hilarious South Park episode when Cesar Millan leash walks Cartman (donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t play the clip unless you can savor crude, crass and profaneÃ‚Â humor). And it just looks so humiliatingÃ¢â‚¬Â¦ but man, what a cool picture!